Why doesn’t anyone ever ask me “Hey, have you built that youth centre you talked about?”


“Hey how are your fitness goals coming along?”


“Been published yet?”


“when are you next on radio?”


“So, cooking school?”

Why do they ever ask me “So, when are you getting married?”


6 thoughts on “when?

  1. If you’re a brown female over the age of 20 and unmarried, it seems to be everyone’s concern. Apparently it should be the biggest concern on our list…hmm I think not!

  2. Because they’re married and have only married stories to talk about. They don’t think about culinary arts or building schools :p
    P.S I should say, not all married people ask that though. The ones will personality will ask you when you plan to fly to the moon 🙂

    Us twenty something women are all in the same boat. sigh!

  3. People tend to relate to other people based on their goals, dreams and their span of thoughts … or in other words, they ask the marriage question because to them that’s a priority, not the other things you listed.

  4. h: yeah i get that
    nabeel: and that’s my point precisely. that its THEIR priority and maybe its mine as well but the persistence with which ppl ask only reveals their bad manners.

    firstly – its no one’s business whether someone’s married, divorced, childless or with child.
    if we’re looking at this from an Islamic perspective – please go ahead and suggest a compatible fella. the question “why aren’t you married yet” or “when are you getting married” presumes much and suggests nothing.

    if a person is actually concerned, they’ll say, hey, have you been looking into marriage and how’s that coming along and they’ll have a real conversation with either me or my parents BECAUSE they have solutions and NOT because they want to simply highlight to me that there’s something wrong with my life.

    in brief – its one thing to show genuine concern and its another to poke the bear
    sensitivities work on both sides and this should be taken care of.

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